5 ways to be Thoughtful and Considerate to Others - by Lynne Nofziger

Being thoughtful, considerate, kind, caring and respectful of others is one of the greatest self-serving actions that you can take. How you treat and think of others reflects on how you think of yourself. Being kind to other people can make a huge difference in your life. There are many people out there that display rude behaviors. Many don’t realize it; they just aren’t making a conscientious effort to think of others feelings. Here are a few tips to motivate you into becoming thoughtful of others. 


The first step toward being thoughtful of others is to admit to yourself that you are not perfect. In fact, realize that, at times, you can be downright inconsiderate and selfish. Many times you don’t even realize it at the moment. But when you realized this has happened, consider how you could have acted differently in the situation. This is a very important part of becoming respectful, kind and caring to others.

Secondly, place yourself in others shoes. This is a key concept in becoming respectful. Consider how others feel. What their needs and wants may be in a given situation. Look at things from their perspective. Make a conscious effort to think of what others are really going through. What would you want to have happen if you were in their place? This task isn’t always easy, but it will get easier with practice. Sometimes you may not be correct in your assumptions about what another’s wants or needs, but it is an important step for you to make the effort to try.

When dealing with other people, always attempt to act with compassion and kindness. If someone else is distressed, even just a little bit, try to ease his or her suffering in some way. Treating others with kindness, respect, and love is one of the best ways to show consideration. You can do this in little ways such as a smile, a kind word, a thank you, or a hug. You can also go out of your way to be courteous to others by holding open a door or letting another person in front of you in traffic. Random acts of kindness go a long way and make a big, big difference.

Practice will improve your efforts and your attitude toward others. Making it a priority with every interaction with another person is a chance to practice being considerate. Every time you speak with someone, send out an email, or even pass someone on the street is an opportunity to practice consideration and respectfulness. Practice, practice, and then, practice some more. This is how you get really good at anything.

Make yourself a goal to do 6 little things each day that are kind and thoughtful. This adds to your practicing efforts. It doesn’t take long or even matter what those things are. Be creative. Try baking something for a family member or friend, tidy up a bit after yourself or someone else, send a sincere thank-you email to a co-worker, say “please” and “your welcome” when others are being considerate of you and your needs, hold the door open for a total stranger, or lend a hand to a friend. Your opportunities are endless. Reach out and do at least 6 things each and every day and soon it will become second nature.

So, what are the rewards of being more considerate to others? First and foremost, it just feels good to be kind to others, do nice things for them, and make other people happier. Second, it makes your life better in so many ways. People start to treat you with more respect and kindness. They may tend to even like you better, and they may be more likely to want to work with you and be with you. And, very importantly, your efforts can make society better a better place to be. Think of what we could have if we all were to treat each other with caring, thoughtfulness, kindness, and respect. We could live better together and work better together. Your small, considerate actions can have an immediate and dramatic effect on your life and others.

(From“5 ways to be Thoughtful and Considerate to Others - by Lynne Nofziger)

Shared by the SBCFoundation...
Like/Share/Be the Difference... "Be a Friend"

This came in from a Frustrated Mom from Pennsylvania a couple of Days a go… Schools are supposedly all “Bully-Free” zones today… this needs to STOP!

Hi: I am writing you about my son who is being bullied... Well on Tuesday, he got into a fight with a child who has been bullying him for months now. The child threw him to the ground and hit his head off the pavement! No teachers saw what had happened apparently, but a child did pull the bully off my son. My son was sent to the nurse’s office, she called me and asked me to come in and evaluate the situation. My son had a bloody goose egg on the back of his head, a bloody lip and nose, he had abrasions and bruises all over his back, side and elbow... I took him to the doctor and they looked him over. He had a concussion. The bully is not in any large amount of trouble!!! He had to have a meeting with my son today at school, they also contacted his parents and he lost recess for 5 days!!! REALLY??? My son is high functioning autistic; he has an anxiety disorder and a few other problems. He is shy, backwards and isn't social, so regardless if I sound like the "Over protective" mother, I know for a fact my son did nothing to deserve this! The police or the school isn't willing to do anything and I am at my wit’s end! If I pull him out of school to be home schooled, not only will it set him back in his therapy and social skills, but also the bullies will win! I am at a loss. If there is anything you could do to help me, PLEASE I am begging you, tell me what to do and I will do it! Thank you!!!!

And something that I just found out today out of the meeting.... Since the child sat down with my son and talked it out with him, he is NOT in any trouble at all!!! So since he now wants to be friends with the child he gave a concussion to, he doesn't have to have any consequences... I am REALLY upset about this!!

Frustrated in Pennsylvania

Today’s Posts:

He who knows only his own side of the case, knows little of that.
- John Stuart Mill

The anti-bullying philosophy Olweus has spawned can be summed up as follows:

"You are entitled to live in a world without mean people. If people repeatedly treat you badly, please don't think it has anything to do with you, your attitudes or your behavior; it is only because of them. You are not strong or smart enough to make them stop, nor is it your responsibility to do so. Just inform the authorities when people upset you, and the authorities will make them stop."

Fear less, hope more;
eat less, chew more:
whine less, breathe more;
talk less, say more;
love more and all good things in life will come to you.

Share/Like/Be the Difference... "Be a Friend"
SBCFoundation

"Tip" Tuesday - March 19, 2013

Parents: - 9:00am Post
Listen. It’s your child’s story; let him or her tell it. Your child may be in emotional pain about the way he or she is being treated and needs your help.

Believe. The knowledge that a child is being bullied can be emotionally painful. To be an effective advocate, parents need to react in a way that encourages their child to trust them.

Be supportive. Tell your child it is not his fault and that he does not deserve to be bullied. Parents should empower their child and avoid judgmental comments about their child or the child who bullies. Your child may already be feeling isolated, and hearing negative statements from parents may only further isolate him.

Be patient. Children may not be ready to open up right away. Talking about the bullying may be difficult, as they may fear retaliation from the bully or believe that even if they tell an adult, nothing will change. Your child might be feeling insecure, withdrawn, frightened, or ashamed.

Provide information. Parents should educate their child about bullying by providing information at a level the child can understand.

Explore options for intervention strategies. Parents can discuss with their child options they may have in dealing with bullying behavior.

TIPS for Parents - 12:00am Post
* Teach your children that if they see someone being bullied, they should not watch, laugh or join in.
* Pay attention to the relationships in your children’s groups. Ensure all children are included and that inappropriate behaviors are addressed.
* Help kids see the value of offering empathy and support to those who are bullied.
* Work with your child’s school to educate others about the problem of bullying.
* Be a good example for your children. Model respectful behaviors at home and in your daily interactions.

TIPS for Parents - Cyber-Bullying - 3:45pm Post
How parents can help stop cyber bullying:
* Familiarize yourself with online activities. Learn about the websites, blogs, chat rooms and cyber lingo that your children are using.
* Keep the computer in a common area so you can monitor activities.
* Keep open communication lines with your children so they feel comfortable talking to you about cyber bullying experiences. Let them know that you are there to support them.
* Recognize that online communication is a very important social aspect in kids’ lives. Do not automatically remove their online privileges if you find out about a cyber bullying experience.
* Talk to your children about what is acceptable behavior online and offline.
* Report any incident of online harassment and physical threats to the local police or your Internet Service Provider.
* Report any bullying that occurs over your child’s cell phone to your phone service provider. You may have to change the phone number if the problem does not stop.

TIPS to Help Parents Prevent Bullying - Schools - 7:15pm Post
Parents and guardians can be among a school's best allies in bullying prevention:

Talk with and Listen to Your Children Everyday Ask questions about their school day, including experiences on the way to and from school, lunch, and recess. Ask about their peers. Children who feel comfortable talking to their parents about these matters before they are involved in bullying are more likely to get them involved after.

Spend time at School and Recess Schools can lack the resources to provide all students individualized attention during "free" time like recess. Volunteer to coordinate games and activities that encourage children to interact with peers aside from their best friends.

Be a Good Example When you get angry at waiters, other drivers or others, model effective communication techniques. As Education.com puts it, "Any time you speak to another person in a mean or abusive way, you're teaching your child that bullying is ok."

Create Healthy Anti-Bullying Habits Starting as young as possible, coach your children on both what not to do (push, tease, and be mean to others) as well as what to do (be kind, empathize, and take turns). Also coach your child on what to do if someone is mean to him or to another (get an adult, tell the bully to stop, walk away and ignore the bully).

Make Sure Your Child Understands Bullying Explicitly explain what it is and that it's not normal or tolerable for them to bully, be bullied, or stand by and watch other kids be bullied

Share/Like/Be the Difference... "Be a Friend"
SBCFoundation                      

"Like" us  on Facebook  / "Follow" us on Twitter

"Be a Friend" Friday Poem

Poem on True Friend

Friend gives you smile
But true friend gives you happiness

Friend will lie about you
But true friend won’t tell your weakness

Friend knives your back
But true friend will slog your face

Thousands friends come when you’re happy
But only one true friend comes when you cry


Friend comes when he needs you
But true friend comes when you need him

Friend leaves when everybody does
But true friend comes when everybody leaves


Friend comes and leaves
But true friend is yours forever


Clara Odelia Ciutara

Inspiring Letter...

Submitted By a Supporter this month...

I am 38 years old. For the first time in my life, I like me. I was bullied starting in seventh grade. At first it seem like it was just joking but then it truned nasty. As the years went by the bullying got worse. It became a contest to see who could be meaner. To the bullies it was a game and they loved every minute of it. It just wasn't one person, it seemed like it was everyone. The mere thought of my name, enraged them with such hatred, that they went out of their way to hurt me. This was not bullying, this was abuse, assalt and harassment. I was chased by kids with baseball bats. I would be walking down the street and kids would jump out of cars and beat me up. I would be on the bus and they would open the doors and push me out while the bus was in motion. Or better yet hold on to my bag and make the bus drag me. I would be pushed down the steps in school. I would have everyone spit on me as I walked by. I never knew why my name brought so much animosity. I was hit by a car and shattered my knee. I hoped that this would give me a reprieve. But it didn't. kids made up stories on how they saved me or they were there and I didn't say thank you. I fell in front of a classroom. I have a full leg cast on, and I can't get up. The teacher saw me and with his foot, pushed me out of his doorway and shut it. I tried killing myself several times but was always afraid. We called the cops, they said there was nothing they could do. We talk to the school again no help. It is my word against their's. Even now on facebook, a class photo will appear, and someone from my class will make a comment.

I read about school's no tolerance policy. To me it is a joke. Kids defending themselves are getting expelled and the bully walk free. You never hear of a bully being expelled. Because most of the kids doing it are on the football team and we cant destroy that. We are not allowed to call them a bully because they have feelings. It really angers me!

I am really excited about these websites. It gives me hope. That there maybe change. Help for kids out there who are suffering. For the first time in 27 years, I am not afraid to leave my house. I never stayed at home, I was not going to let them win. But entering a new place or situtation, it filled me with so much anxiety, that it scared me. I couldn't breath. I also didn't talk about it. It was like a dirty little secret. But everyone knew. and talking about it now, has made it easier. I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. And I have a son who thinks I created the world and a wife who adores me. I wish more could be done to protect these young kids. But until we learn to treat each other with respect and common decency, this will continue. To the parents of victims, please hold tight, always make your children feel special and fight. To the victims of bullying. You are special. Never give up. Your life will get better!

Thank you

"Like Us" on Facebook
"Follow US" on Twitter

Facebook Posts - this Week

Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.
- James Baldwin

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Saying no can be the ultimate self-care.
- Claudia Black

If you really put a small value upon yourself, rest assured that the world will not raise your price.
- Anon

“A lot of people are afraid to tell the truth, to say no. That's where toughness comes into play. Toughness is not being a bully. It's having backbone.”

- Robert Kiyosaki

 

(Coming up on “Be a Friend” Friday)

Poem on True Friend

Friend gives you smile
But true friend gives you happiness

Friend will lie about you
But true friend won’t tell your weakness

Friend knives your back
But true friend will slog your face

Thousands friends come when you’re happy
But only one true friend comes when you cry

Friend comes when he needs you
But true friend comes when you need him

Friend leaves when everybody does
But true friend comes when everybody leaves

Friend comes and leaves
But true friend is yours forever
Clara Odelia Ciutara

Like us on Facebook
Follow us on Twitter

"Tip" Tuesday - From Facebook

8:00am

Ratting versus telling: there is a difference

Ratting is done to get others in trouble.
Ratting hopes to create a problem for someone else.

Telling is done to get help, to take care of yourself or someone else.
Telling tries to solve a problem.

Ratting says "I want to hurt!"
Telling says "Please help!"

12:00pm

Bullying prevention tips: Prevention ideas and tips for parents

Make a plan
Creating an action plan is the first step to addressing bullying, whether you are an educator working with a student being bullied, a parent looking for ways to help your child, or a student who wants to take action.

3:00pm



Bullying prevention tips: Prevention ideas and tips for parents

Talk to your child
Many times, a parent’s first involvement in bullying prevention begins at home when they are concerned that their child may be a target of bullying. Talking to your child about this subject in a helpful way is an important first step. A 2010 study reported that 64 percent of children who were bullied did not report it; only 36 percent reported bullying, so opening the lines of communication is critical.
.................... to be continued ...........

6:00pm

Bullying prevention tips: Prevention ideas and tips for parents

Talk to your child .... CONTINUED
Children can have many reasons for not telling their parents. They may fear an “overreaction,” be embarrassed or ashamed, feel responsible, or think it won’t do any good. They might simply find it hard to talk about anything, or think it’s not “macho” to tell. Some children may not realize that they are being bullied. You might need to ask some indirect questions, such as:

• How was gym class today?
• Who did you sit by at lunch?
• You seem to be feeling sick a lot and want to stay home. Please tell me about that.
• Are kids making fun of you?
• Are there a lot of cliques at school? What do you think about them?

When children choose to tell their parents about bullying, parents might respond in a manner that isn’t helpful. They might tell their child to stand up to the bully; tell their child to ignore and avoid the bully; or take matters into their own hands.

While these reactions all express genuine caring, concern, and good intentions, they are likely to be ineffective and can even have harmful consequences.

9:00pm

Instead, parents should be ready to:
Listen. It’s your child’s story; let him or her tell it. Your child may be in emotional pain about the way he or she is being treated and needs your help.

Believe. The knowledge that a child is being bullied can be emotionally painful. To be an effective advocate, parents need to react in a way that encourages their child to trust them.

Be supportive. Tell your child it is not his fault and that he does not deserve to be bullied. Parents should empower their child and avoid judgmental comments about their child or the child who bullies. Your child may already be feeling isolated, and hearing negative statements from parents may only further isolate him.

Be patient. Children may not be ready to open up right away. Talking about the bullying may be difficult, as they may fear retaliation from the bully or believe that even if they tell an adult, nothing will change. Your child might be feeling insecure, withdrawn, frightened, or ashamed.

Provide information. Parents should educate their child about bullying by providing information at a level the child can understand.

Explore options for intervention strategies. Parents can discuss with their child options they may have in dealing with bullying behavior.

Like us on Facebook 
Follow us on Twitter

"We are Taking Over the World/One Act of Kindness" - Micheal Dirse

To StopBully.com 

The more people who hear this, get it, and pass it on the better. The intent for just "putting it out there" I am sure is obvious, but I wanted to make clear my intentions which are simply that every "act of kindness" is an investment towards "kindness" becoming the rule of behavior, not the exception. I think if kids are given the right tools to encourage this we can truly make the shift happen sooner and that it will be so strong it cannot be shaken or weakened again.

Thanks again for letting me be apart of your project.

Michael Dirse

Lyrics:

We Are Taking Over The World

For Every Cloud A Silver Lining

Far Across The Great Divide

For Every Angel That Is Summoned

A Thousand At Our Side

We Are Taking Over The World

We Are Taking Over The World

We Are Taking Over The World

One Act Of Kindness At A Time

For Every Cloud A Silver Lining

Far Across The Great Divide

For Every Hope That Springs Eternal

Another Thousand Multiplied

We Are Taking Over The World

We Are Taking Over The World

We Are Taking Over The World

One Act Of Kindness At A Time

For Every Cloud A Silver Lining

Far Across The Great Divide

For Every Voice That Goes Unspoken

A Thousand Voices Unified

We Are Taking Over The World

We Are Taking Over The World

We Are Taking Over The World

One Act Of Kindness At A Time